My Husband's "Mistress"

My husband has a "mistress".

Don's "mistress" crept into our lives during the early years of our marriage, shaking us to the breaking point on many occasions. He has never wanted "her" but despite his efforts, he is unable to get "her" to leave. I have resigned myself to the fact that "she" will be an unwanted part of the rest of our lives.

His "mistress" has created financial hardships. "Her" demands have made it difficult for Don to advance in his career. "She" has pulled him away from work at critical times, diminishing his credibility and impacting his effectiveness. To keep "her" away as much as possible requires us to tap into our household budget regularly, making acquiring savings for vacations, retirement or extras a struggle.

"She" is always on our minds, invading our thoughts and conversations. Don and I have always had honest and often painful discussions about "her" intrusion into our lives. His "mistress" has caused many heated arguments, cruel words and sorrow.

Don's "mistress" has taken him from my bed. He sleeps with "her" every night causing him to toss and turn. Because of "her", Don will often sleep on the couch so as to not disturb me with the restlessness that "she" causes him.

"She" has disrupted vacations. Many times we've had to cancel or reschedule much-needed vacations because "she" needed attention. When we do go away, we are always aware of the limitations that "she" imposes on Don.

Don feels guilty for having this evil "mistress." He never meant to impose "her" on me and he questions why I stay with him through all this turmoil. While I have been pushed to the very edge of despair, the thought of leaving my one true love has never been an option.

Don hates "her". His love and devotion to me are unquestioned. However, "her" ability to wrench him away from me is stronger than our love for each other. And I know, in the end, "she" will ultimately take him away from me.

My husband's "mistress" is his poor health and on-going medical issues.

[Dear family and friends: please forgive me this bitter rant. After coming home from another emergency room trip at 2 in the morning and having to reschedule our vacation to see our new grandbaby, I am hurting. Don is feeling much better, by the way and, thanks to this blog-therapy, so am I.]